Sunday, 22 December 2013

5 Ways to Handle Your Short-tempered Spouse

Most marriages go through periods of highs and lows. Therefore, it is pretty common for a husband and wife to differ on certain points.
At times one person becomes more dominant than the
other. If the husband enjoys making his point heard, the
wife would prefer to let him have his say to maintain
calmness in their bond. Or, the wife may disagree with her
husband on different topics and the husband might choose
to act as the peacemaker. Well, here are some ways to
handle your spouse's temper effectively.

1. Recognize the triggers

The first step is to recognize each other's temperament.
Make it a point to voice your feelings to one another in the
best possible way without being condescending or
judgmental. Once both of you are aware of what acts as a
trigger for your respective anger issues, you can deal with
them more effectively. It is common knowledge that 'opposites attract', and so make sure that both of you balance each other out and are aware of what irks the other.

2. Take a step back

Secondly, it would be wise if you took a step back to allow
your partner to cool down. Therefore, if you find your
spouse getting angry over something, do not make things
worse by tackling them or reprimanding them for their
actions there and then. Instead, step aside and allow them to
calm down. In time, they themselves will come back and
apologize for their outburst. The key here is to give them
their space so that they can realize their folly on their own.

3. Keep your own attitude under check

Realize that at times it might be your behavior and attitude
that might cause tempers to fly. If you fight fire with fire,
you will land up in a stalemate with the problem still left
unsolved. It is vital that you manage your emotions well in
order to prevent any major outburst with your temperamental spouse. So, if you know that there are things that could cause an emotional outburst; your reaction to it could determine whether it has the possibility of turning ugly or getting resolved.

4. Dig into some patience

Fourthly, in order to really deal effectively with your short-
tempered spouse, you will need to dig into your reserve of
patience. Sometimes you may disapprove of your spouse's
outbursts over trivial and petty issues. These may cause you
to wonder what you might have done wrong. However, the
key to dealing with such outbursts over minor issues is to
have the patience to deal with your partner calmly.

Therefore, avoid responding with equally nasty comments
that could rupture into something major.

5. Encourage them towards change

Lastly, you could help encourage your spouse to adopt
certain tips to calm down during an outburst. Deep
breathing and maybe some meditation in the morning could
prove to be the right solutions to help your partner control
his/her temperament. Also, make sure to inform your
spouse about the ill-effects of anger, namely how it can
lead to complications and affect their health in the bargain.
These tips are sure to keep a check on your spouse's temper
issues, thereby ensuring that your marriage is stable and
happy.

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